Helping Teenagers Determine God's Direction In Their Lives
Just the other evening, one of my seniors in high school said seriously, "Jeanne, we need to talk. I'm really confused." Somehow, I knew intuitively where the discussion was going. "I have to make some major decisions about where I'm going to college," she continued, "and I'm really confused about how to know God's direction in all of this."
It's the age-old dilemma faced by many of your most conscientious students. They really do want to follow the Lord's direction in their lives. But how do they honestly determine it? After all, most of us haven't had an angel sky-write a message in the clouds to us recently.
So in this blog and the next, I want to highlight some of my simple advice to my graduating senior that evening. Maybe it will help you with some of yours:
- God's will is not so much "supernatural" as it is "super natural." By that I mean that we often make God's direction in our lives too complex and ethereal. When we prioritize keeping Christ as Number One in our lives on a daily basis, His guidance is a natural by-product of our daily walk. Don't make this too tough! I think it's harder for the sincere Christian to be out of the will of God than in it.
- Confidently follow the Psalm 37:4 Principle. Remember the verse? "Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart." That simply means that our primary responsibility is to keep "delighting ourselves" in Him through the cultivation of our daily relationship with Him. Then we can trust confidently that He will transfer His desires to our hearts so they become our desires. That's why I smilingly ask my conscientious students, "What is in your heart to do? What seems the most appealing to you?" Often times, we almost unconsciously believe that God is a "Cosmic Killjoy" and that His guidance will point us far away from our heart's desire. Nothing could be further from the truth.
Just the other evening, one of my seniors in high school said seriously, "Jeanne, we need to talk. I'm really confused." Somehow, I knew intuitively where the discussion was going. "I have to make some major decisions about where I'm going to college," she continued, "and I'm really confused about how to know God's direction in all of this."
It's the age-old dilemma faced by many of your most conscientious students. They really do want to follow the Lord's direction in their lives. But how do they honestly determine it? After all, most of us haven't had an angel sky-write a message in the clouds to us recently.
So in this blog and the next, I want to highlight some of my simple advice to my graduating senior that evening. Maybe it will help you with some of yours:
- God's will is not so much "supernatural" as it is "super natural." By that I mean that we often make God's direction in our lives too complex and ethereal. When we prioritize keeping Christ as Number One in our lives on a daily basis, His guidance is a natural by-product of our daily walk. Don't make this too tough! I think it's harder for the sincere Christian to be out of the will of God than in it.
- Confidently follow the Psalm 37:4 Principle. Remember the verse? "Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart." That simply means that our primary responsibility is to keep "delighting ourselves" in Him through the cultivation of our daily relationship with Him. Then we can trust confidently that He will transfer His desires to our hearts so they become our desires. That's why I smilingly ask my conscientious students, "What is in your heart to do? What seems the most appealing to you?" Often times, we almost unconsciously believe that God is a "Cosmic Killjoy" and that His guidance will point us far away from our heart's desire. Nothing could be further from the truth.
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We all deal with the daunting questions sometime in our lives like, "What's next?" ... "How do I know if this is God's will for my life?" ... "What are the ways Gods speaks?" As these are all BIG questions, it becomes sometimes overwhelming to think of where to even BEGIN in directing our students.
In this Source, I share a story that has anchored me when seeking Divine Guidance, both on small and large decisions. We all want to know that our "spiritual navigational system" is accurate so we don't crash from wrong decisions or wrong turns in our life. It's really pretty simple. Just make sure that the THREE HARBOR LIGHTS OF GUIDANCE are lined up as one and you can be confident that the Lord is directing your decision and keeping you ON COURSE.
Committed to staying on course,
"The Gray Zone" - It's a place that many of the teenagers in your youth ministry probably spend more time than you wish. What is it? It's the unspoken territory where convictions and standards are neither clearly "wrong" nor "right," neither clearly "black" or "white;" just a confusing "gray."
Years ago in youth ministry I learned that principles are received much easier than rules. So this Source is a set of "filter questions" to help your teenagers develop their own clear convictions in the crucial gray zone. It's one of those messages that you'll want to keep nearby for even future use on an individual basis.
Bless you, my friend, as you yourself continue to fine-tune your own spiritual convictions in the many "gray zones" we face as leaders. May you make your decisions realizing that we "TEACH what we know, but we REPRODUCE who we are."
Lovingly,
We all want to change the world. When we are young, we dream of being superheroes, firefighters, and veterinarians, however as we grow older, our aspirations develop and take new form. The bottom line is that we never stop dreaming. The challenge we begin to face is refusing to simply daydream, but choosing to daily invent our futures.
In this Source, "Dream Keepers," I help our students put action behind their aspirations. So, listen in as I use Scripture, some key truths and video clips of real people, who realized some pretty amazing dreams of their own, to challenge our students to have enough courage and character to not just be "Dreamers," but "Dream Keepers."
Lovingly,
A few days ago I had to make a tough call. I had to tell another young lady that for the next three months, she was no longer welcome at our youth group. The reasons were complex, but let me assure you that it was an unavoidable and right decision. As you can understand, I became Public Enemy #1 in the eyes of a few of her closest friends. Though it’s not a very fun place to be, I learned a long time ago that you can never be their leader if you need them to always like you. I call it the balance between being a coach and being a companion in youth ministry. Granted, all significant youth ministry is relationally strong, but when the unavoidable times come where one of those two roles must win, I suggest that your coach role usually needs to trump your companion one.
In this month's Youth Leader's Coach, "Coach vs. Companion," I'm sharing some comparisons of being a leader and a friend in our students' lives. Now don’t hear me wrong. It's strategic in youth ministry to be a touchable friend and companion. Relationship is always king, but don't sacrifice your credentials to be their spiritual coach. In the end it's always worth it!
Lovingly,
Researchers at Stanford University conducted an experiment at an upscale grocery store to learn more about how people make choices. By offering samples of 6 different types of jams on one day and on an alternate day 24 different types, they discovered with 24 different types of jams, that people became overwhelmed and it was much more difficult to pick just one! So often our students are in such a similar mindset in their lives, that with so many choices of what to do next, that they are asking themselves the overwhelming question, "What in the world am I supposed to do for the rest of my life?!" It is up to us to help guide them in that decision making process!
In this Source, I honestly share that finding God's will for your future is often pretty unglamorous. I demystify the process by sharing "The Sacred 7." Thought provoking things to consider including key questions like...Does it align with God's Word? Is there an internal peace associated with it? Do the circumstances (money, parents, opportunity) line up? I leave them with some life-giving Scriptures to pray to the Lord as they seek His guidance and challenge them to write down a few of their "Jam Options."
It's painfully true that people who “have dreams” are COMMON. But the people who are willing, over the test of time, to pay the price tags to move that dream into a reality, are FEW AND FAR BETWEEN. They earn their own position in the “Halls of Destiny.” And, those people are rare indeed.
Lovingly,
