Be The Last To Leave
After every youth service, make arrangements to hang out for a long time. Unless an emergency arises, you should be one of the last people to ever leave the room that night.
I'm often asked, "How did you make the teenagers in your ministries still feel special as it started to grow to some of the bigger numbers? My answer to that question involves lots of things, including our small group format. But one of my simplest, most profound keys has always been the fact that I stayed at the conclusion of the service until the last kid was done with me.
As the group grew larger, I knew it was no longer possible to take personal appointments with many of the teenagers. Most of my personal appointment time had to be targeted to a few key leaders and "core teenagers" that I strategically gave my life to. But at the conclusion of each youth service, the teenagers all knew that anyone could talk with me if they were willing to hang around long enough. The leaders that I was attempting to mentor saw that pattern and also prioritized staying around to talk.
Through the years, it has not been uncommon for me to leave a youth service, or now a gathering of The Cadre men and women I mentor to, between 1:00 & 2:00 a.m. (Obviously with the teenagers, I make sure that if they stay really late, they call home to make sure it's OK with their parents.) Smilingly, on my farewell service in Illinois, the teenagers stood in line to talk with me until 4:30 in the morning! A few of the kids plopped down on the carpet and fell asleep, telling the next kid in line to wake them up when it was THEIR TURN.
Lots of great youth leaders dream of the day when their teenagers will wait in line until 4:30 a.m. to express love and gratitude. But you see, I paid my "dues" for that night by staying to talk with "whosoever will" until 1 or 2 a.m. for the 13 years prior to that night.
Remember that actions of love on your part will always eventually create actions of love from your teenagers towards you. The law of sowing and reaping applies to much more than just the offering plate!
After every youth service, make arrangements to hang out for a long time. Unless an emergency arises, you should be one of the last people to ever leave the room that night.
I'm often asked, "How did you make the teenagers in your ministries still feel special as it started to grow to some of the bigger numbers? My answer to that question involves lots of things, including our small group format. But one of my simplest, most profound keys has always been the fact that I stayed at the conclusion of the service until the last kid was done with me.
As the group grew larger, I knew it was no longer possible to take personal appointments with many of the teenagers. Most of my personal appointment time had to be targeted to a few key leaders and "core teenagers" that I strategically gave my life to. But at the conclusion of each youth service, the teenagers all knew that anyone could talk with me if they were willing to hang around long enough. The leaders that I was attempting to mentor saw that pattern and also prioritized staying around to talk.
Through the years, it has not been uncommon for me to leave a youth service, or now a gathering of The Cadre men and women I mentor to, between 1:00 & 2:00 a.m. (Obviously with the teenagers, I make sure that if they stay really late, they call home to make sure it's OK with their parents.) Smilingly, on my farewell service in Illinois, the teenagers stood in line to talk with me until 4:30 in the morning! A few of the kids plopped down on the carpet and fell asleep, telling the next kid in line to wake them up when it was THEIR TURN.
Lots of great youth leaders dream of the day when their teenagers will wait in line until 4:30 a.m. to express love and gratitude. But you see, I paid my "dues" for that night by staying to talk with "whosoever will" until 1 or 2 a.m. for the 13 years prior to that night.
Remember that actions of love on your part will always eventually create actions of love from your teenagers towards you. The law of sowing and reaping applies to much more than just the offering plate!
Related Items
I recorded this Youth Leader's Coach quite some time ago, but I'm including it in the Playbook because it marked the beginning of an exciting new chapter in my ministry. We had just recently made the move to Sacramento, CA and I had accepted the role of "Director of Student Ministries." So even though I was over 50 at the time, once again, I started from "ground zero."
Charting the growth of a youth ministry from the beginnings can definitely be an overwhelming charge, however there are some simple concepts that can make the journey much easier and effective. As I started this new season, I paused to reflect on some basic, but essential, principles that I put into action in Sacramento.
Even if you're not starting out in a new youth ministry, you can still apply these concepts to your current youth ministry. All of them serve as guidelines to take any youth ministry to the next level. As you take this hour just to listen and reflect on these principles, may you be captured once more, by God's "heart" in reaching this generation of youth. We really do have the greatest "job" in the world!
Lovingly,
The wisdom of Proverbs 23:7 tells us, "For as a man thinks in his heart, so is he." And, James Allen echoed it well when he said, "You are today, where your thoughts have brought you. You will be tomorrow, where your thoughts take you."
How we "think" is such a key component of success that, in this Youth Leader's Coach, we are going to cash in on ten years of study by Dr. Seymore Epstein, Chairman of the Psychology Department at the University of Massachusetts, on how super achievers think.
As you listen, honestly evaluate yourself on the nine distinct patterns that emerged and zero in on a couple areas where opportunity for improvement exists in your life and ministry.
Lovingly,
The majority of us have seen or channel surfed past "Flip That House" or a show like it. And, whether you're a HGTV/TLC fan or not, most of us in youth ministry have felt a similar need to "Flip That Youth Group." This need for a new and improved look may be in the area of outreach, worship, community, spiritual tenor or something entirely different. Regardless, whether now or later, we know the need for change is inevitable. Navigating that change can either be glorious if done well or catastrophic if not.
In this Youth Leader's Coach, we look at how to create specific change in our youth ministries without demolishing them. So, grab a cup of coffee and join me as we look at four things that will help us accomplish the task at hand one kid at a time.
Lovingly,
What is the ONE THING you want to "leave it all on the field" for?
Based off of the epic true story from a football championship game of the Permian High School Panthers, this month's Source is called, "FRIDAY NIGHT LIGHTS"!
In this Source, I talk about what it takes to keep us in the "spiritual game" of life and the sacrifices for success it requires. Also, what it takes to find our ONE THING that we fight for as we reach down to the core of our ultimate calling...the purpose that keeps us going. With some inspiring clips from the movie and key Scriptures from the life of King David and some of his mighty men, I challenge our students to fight for a God-Sized Dream that will last into eternity.
Still chasing my 500-pound lion,
You'll love this Source! Using the example of Desmond Doss, the first conscientious objector to earn a medal of honor for bravery during World War II portrayed in the incredible movie, Hacksaw Ridge, I challenge our students to go through the roof! To live a WIT (Whatever It Takes) life of heroism and selflessness.
With some key Scriptures and a few clips from the movie, I remind our students that "Heroes are often ordinary people that simply chose to put their dreams above their fears." What a REAL and SOBERING description of what ministry can feel like for all of us sometimes...a constant battle to get JUST ONE MORE, right after we've gotten one to safety. Yet, for Desmond Doss, as with each one of you, he was remembered for his life's sacrifice of selflessness as he looked past the pain and saved, JUST...ONE...MORE.
Saving just one more, right alongside you,
